Spotted Banana

This is based on an account that occurred between the hours of 1345hrs and 1410hrs EAT…

 

I was hungry,

So,

I went hunting,

For a spotted banana,

Because I heard that they don’t make you fart,

Unlike the ones that are flawless on the outside,

But oh so gas-y on the inside.

 

On my way I spotted,

A guy with a wheel that sharpens knives,

A guy selling roasted maize by the side of the road,

A guy I had scolded for selling me chapatis with his bear hands..this time, he used a napkin to sell me some,

A guy in a Subaru who kinda looked like my crush,

A couple in a Mercedes…looking oh so fly,

A family on vacation,

A couple of bananas..that weren’t the spotted kind,

A guy who cat-called me from a wall…”Hey,hey…Rasta baby…madam…Supuu…Kuja(Come)!,

An ambulance on the side of the road,

A guy in a suit…the dark blue kind that I like *wink*,

A guy who tried to say hey,

And a pretty lady looking kinda shy,

A car I’d liked to buy someday…that had me peeping inside,

A car that had parked wrongly,

And finally!

A spotted banana!!

 

 

1808hrs,

1/3/2019,

Nairobi,Kenya.

Song:Nwa Baby by Davido

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But I Love you so.

I don’t know you,

But I love the way,

The way your skin feels against mine,

As we sleep nude under the moonlight.

The way that you smile makes me warm up inside,

And your laugh makes me think of how lucky I am to be with this guy.

 

I don’t know you,

But I love the way you love me too,

With tenderness and laughter,

Dancing slow,

Just you and I,

Grinding up on the dance floor to our favorite song.

 

I don’t know you,

But I love the way you fold the program, after an art show…because you are hungry and then you say…”Baby, let’s go home?”,

How you bring me flowers,

And hold my hands all night long.

 

I don’t know you,

But I love how you feel on my neck,

Butterfly kisses. Beautiful butterfly kisses.

 

I don’t know you,

But I love when I hug you after you’ve had a long hard day,

And I tell you that it’s okay to cry,

Because even the sky cries sometimes.

 

I don’t know you,

But boy don’t I love you,

I Love you so.

I Love you so.

I Love you so.

 

1041hrs,

30/12/2018

Nairobi,Kenya.

Song: Surrender by Mr.Eazi(I played it twice for good measure lol)

PS: I don’t know you, but I hope you’ll love this song 😀

 

Voices

Who are the voices in your head? 

Your parents?

Your spiritual teachers? 

Your family? 

Your friends?

Your politicians?

Your enemies?

Maybe even frenemies? 

 

Who’s impressions of life are you carrying onwards? 

Who’s beliefs are you embodying? 

Who’s voice are you listening to?

And most importantly, 

Who’s voice are you believing? 

 

We were born as blank slates , not knowing,only open to learning. Then we met our primary caregivers, sometimes our parents, other times our guardians. And their voices became ours.

There’s a day I was getting my hair done. And then my locktician(Hey Eric!), told me that I looked beautiful. Instead of taking the compliment gracefully , I looked at him and asked “With this big forehead?”. He was taken aback and asked “Who told you that you have a big forehead?”. I was embarrassed for a second before he diluted the situation by saying “Anyway, girls with a big forehead are usually the prettiest”. After that though, I asked myself the same question. “Where did I get the impression that I have a big forehead? Probably from someone else who might have mentioned it as a joke, and one I took seriously. Though after I looked at myself in the mirror,this forehead is as forehead as it can be.

And ,it’s a thing I’ve observed in a lot of people, including myself. We walk around with impressions of ourselves, that are not our own voices. Thinking about how we are not smart enough, not tall enough, not manly or womanly enough ,not beautiful enough, not strong enough, not having the perfect size of a nose, not beautiful enough. Not enough. Standards obtained from an other.

Who’s voice would you like to have in your head? 

And is it a message you’d like to hear? 

To have as your identity?

Your reality? 

 

1251hrs,

27/12/2017,

Eldoret, Kenya. 

Song: Simple blessings-Tarrus Riley

Soul Call-Gratitude

Imagine if you had a person that you love with sweet abandon. You’d give this person the whole world. Every little thing that they ask for.

But…every time you give them what they ask for, they forget that they asked for this thing and…asks for more. They then take the thing you gave them , puts it aside, smiles at it, and then, comes back for more.

Well, it happens a lot.  We ask life for more and more each day. Hoping that at some point, what we asked for will make us happier than we currently are. But, we tend to forget that at some point, we asked for what we have right now, hoping that it would make us happier. Ironic.

Gratitude is fuel for all the things we have. For all the things we receive, manifested in our physical reality. Mostly, not how we expected it, but still, as beautiful…if we look closely

I was challenged on this matter by my soul today…so here I am, learning about being grateful for what I have in my life at this moment, because…I do remember when I prayed for the things I have in my life right now.

1423hrs,

12/18/2018,

Nairobi, Kenya.

Song(s): Feels like Summer by Childish Gambino and Sativa-Jhene Aiko ft Rae Sremmurd

 

 

The art of letting go,when art was my worst class.

I’d like to say goodbye,

And thank you,
For all the times that we had, 
The laughs,
The love,
The hand holding,
The dancing,
The flowers,
The hugs,
Everything.

And thank you,
For all the tears I’m crying,
The pain I’m feeling,
It makes me feel alive
Makes me feel that I loved,
And I did,
With my heart,
That’s crying,
And being grateful at the same time.

 

This piece is inspired by the pain I am feeling today. Death and goodbyes have been a theme in my life this weekend. Yesterday, I met someone who was saying goodbye to his mother, who was in hospital fading away, with her family by her side, a bitter sweet thing. Bitter because she’s leaving, sweet because they have a chance to say goodbye.

Later on, I got news that a friend lost her papa, the love of her life and, it hit me. I sat there asking death why it is here, always looming over us, watching from a far, waiting for the time our ticket rings up. I asked death why it is here, and it said, “One thing child, life is a cycle, and I am just but a stage. And besides, you’d be so many people if I didn’t exist”. Apparently, death has a sense of humor. I wish it also had a balm that could soothe the pain it leaves behind, and wipe our tears away.

 

I’d like to say goodbye,

And thank you,
For all the times that we had, 
The laughs,
The love,
The hand holding,
The dancing,
The flowers,
The hugs,
Everything.

And thank you,
For all the tears I’m crying,
The pain I’m feeling,
It makes me feel alive
Makes me feel that I loved,
And I did,
With my heart,
That’s crying,
And being grateful at the same time.

 

My friend is leaving the office, and I just met him 2 weeks ago. You know how you meet someone and then you just click? Yeah, one of those people you wish you had more time with, to learn from them, and laugh with them. I’ll miss you man.

I hate goodbyes,
I hate these tears in my eyes
I hate myself for the way I feel about you every time
I’ve had enough
I’m sick of wishing you were around me every day, every night
its way too much
I hate love

Lyrics from Toni Braxton-I hate love

And no, I’m not in-love with my workmate. Haha.

1047hrs,
10/12/2018
Nairobi, Kenya.
Song(s) (One started when the other was ending, the main one is Kendricks’ though, i don’t pick the songs, they just come to the pieces I write): J.Tek- The Come up and Kendrick Lamar-Sing About Me. 

 

 

Forgiveness

Forgive yourself for all the things you feel you did not do yesterday, 

For all the things you feel that you should not have done,

For all the times you said that you would never again but then yet again…you did,

Let go of the undoing,

Of the disappointment that you felt,

Forgive yourself,

Forgive yourself.

 

1224hrs,

23/10/2018,

Nairobi, Kenya,

Music: None because my earphones died *insert tear streaked face here*

Art from this amazing article on self-love (Click on the word), a thing we all need and deserve from ourselves.

 

Dreams

Do not look at me with a smirk on your face,

Driving by in that Mercedes Benz,

Thinking “He should work harder and get a better job”

Or “Why is he wearing a torn t-shirt for Petes sake?”

Who the hell is Pete? My name is James!

I pull this loaded cart,

Thinking about that day when I will finally sit down and have my own shop,

My own house,

My own family,

My own empire,

My own Mercedes Benz,

And with each sweat that pours into my eyes,

Each burning sensation that comes,

Is a step closer to my dreams,

So much bigger than what it may seem,

As you drive by in your Mercedes Benz.

 

11:22am,

Nairobi, Kenya.

Song: Kama Kawaida by Muthoni the Drummer Queen, Kagwe Mungai, Fena and Mayonde.

Artwork here!